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How To Get Over A Breakup: Four Steps On How To Move On And Find Your Happiness

Heartbreak is like grief: it's a process, and it takes time to move through - and there's no "right" way to do it. Everyone handles their own personal heartbreak in different ways, and everyone will experience their own particular brand of heartache. Just as we're all unique individuals with our own personalities, fears, hopes and dreams, we all handle the pain of love differently.

But does heartbreak last forever? No one wants to be an insta-rebound; we all want the chance to mourn and move on with our lives. Here are 5 ways you can deal with heartbreak so that you can become a stronger person after experiencing some tough times

What is heartbreak?

You can feel it in your chest and think that you’re going to die of a broken heart. It's terrible, but you wouldn't be the first person, nor will you be the last one to experience it.

Why does heartbreak hurt so bad?

Four steps for working through heartbreak

1. Understand the process and experience the stages

According to the Kuber-Ross model, there are five stages to process in terms of grief.

The first is denial, not quite believing that this is happening. It's when you feel confused because it doesn't make sense and now you're trying to go back and spot what you missed. The second is anger. If you're being broken up with, this is completely out of your control and if you're being told this is what's happening, this can add to the emotions piling up. And you have a right to be angry, even if the break up is the best thing for you both and even if you can't quite see that now. After this comes bargaining. The lowest point at which you turn inward to what you could've done differently, of seeing if there's a compromise to get through it again. Fourth comes the depression stage. Here, your heartbreak experience has you question "what's the point any more?". Whether it's heartbreak from a longer or shorter relationship, and depending on your attachment style, this kind of trauma, it makes you question everything in your life. This sounds daunting, but helps you to evaluate what you do in your life. Refreshingly, the fifth stage is acceptance. You can breathe a sigh of relief that you're through the worst of it and continuing the upward trajectory. You see your break-up as one chapter ending and another beginning, with opportunity on the horizon. No longer do you resent the upheaval, but instead see it as a freeing experience and one that you grew through.

2. Overcome the 3 Ps, Personalisation, Pervasiveness + Permanence

From Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience and Finding Joy*, I came across the 3 PsWe are at fault

Will affect all areas of our lvies

Aftershocks last forever

* Build your resilience

* Develop a new sense of identity and ensure your needs are being met

* The disclaimer provides that such information is merely educational – not medical advice. If users need medical advice, they should consult a doctor or other appropriate medical professional. *


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