The day of love that can fill a single person's mind with dread: Valentine's Day. Much like Christmas, it's a reminder of the relationship we don't have or it might even remind us of the relationships we did have that are now gone. And even if you aren't particularly fussed about being in a relationship, all kinds of FOMO can creep in with not having that person to spend the day with, which only goes on to remind you of how you don't have someone to message at the end of the day.
Being Single on Valentine's Day doesn't have to be such a big deal.
Valentine's Day is a day of LOVE. Whilst traditionally that means romantic love, when we consider Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love, there's a whole host of what love can mean and it doesn't exclusively have to be romantic.
Self-love, familial love, platonic love, love for your friends... Instead of seeing Valentine's Day as a day for couples, we have the choice to see it in a different light and do it in a way that suits us single girls perfectly.
And here's 5 ways you can make the most of being single this Valentine's Day
1. Pamper Evening
Self-love is one of the greatest forms of love there is out there. You won't have got through any part of dating life without hearing "you have to love yourself before you can love someone else". The idea behind a pamper evening is to treat yourself the way you would treat your other half - or how you'd expect them to treat you.
Go and buy yourself the red roses. Grab a bath bomb, a bottle of Prosecco and a box of chocolates. Run that hot, steamy bath and indulge for an hour or two soaking it all up.
Be the treat you give to yourself! (You can find links to some items I suggest here)
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2. Go out on a date with your friend
So your coupled up friends might already be busy for the evening but that doesn't mean another single girlie of yours wouldn't love to go out for a meal. Agree to go all out as if it was a date, have the three course meal and enjoy the cocktails together and celebrate single life together.
You can beat the crowds, and maybe even get your coupled up friend to join, by celebrating on 13th February, more popularly know as Galentine's Day, the day before Valentine's Day itself.
And you can go the extra mile by sending your bestie a Galentine's Day card to tell them what they mean to you, just as you would a romantic love interest. (And you'll get double friend points of their love language is words of affirmation!)
3. Join in with the Single on Valentine's Day Events
Valentine's Day can also be the motivator to get you focussed on your single life. Whether you want to hang out with other single ladies, start addressing your feelings of loneliness or start preparing yourself to get back to dating, I've put together three Single on Valentine's Day events to help with each one of those.
Click on the links below so that you don't miss out on becoming the single, independent woman that starts taking ownership of their life this Valentine's Day.
4. Go on a solo date
Who says you can't take yourself out on a date? Going for a meal alone can be one of the most daunting solo activities to do so if this is your first, try other kinds of solo activities that you'll feel comfortable doing like taking a trip to the cinema, going to see a show... Imagine your dream date night and give yourself the experience ALONE.
(And I promise you, less people are looking at you wondering what you're doing on your own than you think!)
This is next-tier levels of self-love. Often we think that self love is treating ourselves. This is part of it and one of the easier things to do but if you really want to move forwards, then you have to heal. Valentine's Day may not be the obvious time to do this but if your feelings are coming up and being triggered by the day, then it's worth exploring them.
Whether you meditate, journal or need to book in with your therapist, now is the day to take notice of your emotions and explore what's really going on for you.
Acknowledge the feeling that's coming up on Valentine's Day and start exploring where it's coming from and why, and you're a few steps further into your true self-love journey.
Whatever you do this Valentine's Day, remember you get to choose what you make of it! You always have a choice and today is no different. Find what love you want to share and make the most of being Single on Valentine's Day.